Biggest announcement of all time!!!

My family hardly ever calls me. If they do, it is because:

1) They have big plans for me (to accomplish for them)
2) They have super-big news to share

So when Daddy called to see if I was free on Saturday, I knew I'd be doing something... yes! Pick up Jason's new car which just happened to be in Indiana!

When Ardith called me last night... first I didn't recognize the area code, because people from Cedar Rapids just never call me. When she told me who she was, I was ticked pink and immediately keyed up for something - whatever could be momentous enough to call me for...

Pretty much just the most radical news ever for the Hoyt Family! The first child is engaged!

Really

While I was checking my junk mail account on Yahoo, this news headline caught my eye:

"Swine flu not as potent as first feared"

That's English, but I think it should still be translated into behind-the-scenes Media:

"Shoot! We can't keep pushing breaking news about a mutating virus that will explode into a worldwide epidemic, after all."

Long Blonde Life, 20 April 2009

Since not all my hundreds of blog readers are on Facebook, and since no one seriously reads everything their "friends" post on Facebook anyway...

If you think a cheesecake takes a long time to bake, try baking it at 225 F. instead of 325 F.

But try not to try this an hour before you want to go to bed.

Pretending to be an IT Whiz

Hurray!! Stacey's Internet is working again. All it took was an IP re-set (configuration back to automatic) and a system re-start.

Now I can't really take credit for it, as the success results from the following:

A) What Daddy taught me and working backward from that
B) Stacey's computer needing a very long siesta

That said, IT work is fun. Seems to me like it is usually either tricking the computer into doing what you want, or force it to do what you want.

A good example of the latter is one of the times my work computer went to the blue screen for Dumping Physical Memory, refused to respond to any reasonable tactics, and was promptly unplugged. That worked. At least it worked for a week, I think.

Then I did have to get a "real" IT person in to run diagnostics and handle the scientifically medical end of fixing computers.

The Great Showdown

Betcha didn't know a TV show review could be preparation for Easter Sunday, did you?

Well, I didn't either, till five minutes ago when I finished an episode of Bonanza titled "Showdown". Sorry to spoil it for anyone, but to make the point I really have to run through the whole story:

A gang just robbed a bank in Virginia City, where the Cartwrights live. The gang leader sends one of his guys to the Cartwright ranch (the Ponderosa) to become a hired hand and pick up what news he can, while the rest of the gang lies low. So Sam heads off, gets hired, gets suspected by Little Joe but no one else, finds out the Army is coming in to look for the gang, and goes back to his boss to report this.

Little Joe happens to be following him and gets caught. The boss sends Sam back to the Ponderosa to find out from which direction the Army will be coming. Little does he know the sheriff is waiting at the Ponderosa for him. He has found out about Sam's prison record (true) and wants to take him in. Ben Cartwright says that's no valid charge and Sam will stay at the ranch with them, sheriff leaves. Sam, however, does not thank the Cartwrights, instead he clears out, clubbing Adam over the head when Adam starts talking to him.

Sam gets back to his boss, finds him beating Little Joe, manages to save little Joe by suggesting an alternate plan and then he and Joe gang up to beat the gang. Little Joe promises Sam he has friends now. Meanwhile, Ben, Adam, and Hoss are coming after Sam with a bunch of men, having decided they were wrong about Sam and looking for Little Joe. They see Little Joe coming in the distance, and Sam with him, and one of them says, "I guess we were all wrong about Sam". Show ends.

I don't know about you, but I can imagine two untold scenarios:

1) Sam goes on to work for the Ponderosa and no one ever finds out he was part of the gang
2) They find out he was part of the gang but he gets off because he helped bring in the gang

But regardless of what happens to Sam, what strikes me is how the Cartwrights deal with him. Most of them trust him, despite knowing nothing about him. Little Joe doesn't trust him, but once Sam starts fighting on the right side, he's his friend. But why does Sam start fighting on the right side? Because the Cartwrights are good people and do good to him, even when others are suspecting him. They DON'T know that he's with the gang, but they are good, so they believe in him.

Similarly and yet powerfully opposite, we can now be on the right side. Why? Because God is a good God and did good to us, even when we were His enemies. He KNEW we were His enemies, but He is so good that He wasn't just willing to "give us a chance" to prove ourselves to Him - He knew we couldn't do it, so He gave us the chance, at His own expense. His goodness and love are overwhelming.

Don't read this, look 2 posts down

Guatemala - Day 1, Part 3 is up, below... That's what you get when you start one post and publish another one later!

It's going to be a long, blonde life

Well, since none of my siblings are posting, I guess the torch is left to the one who probably shouldn't even be allowed to have a blog, let alone write for it...

Today is Saturday, which means yesterday was Friday. Kendra and I spent Friday evening exploring the trails which lie between her dorm and my chicken coop. Then I had a brilliant idea. I had coupons for Dairy Queen that would expire March 31, and Dairy Queen was nearby. Why not use them before they expired?

After some debate, we finally settled on using the one that would get us a wrap and a blizzard. Let's clarify how the coupon worked. If we bought a blizzard, we got a free wrap.

So we got up to the checkout, placed our orders, and the girl asks, "What size blizzard?" Kendra is about to opt for a small. I think, Wait - why not get the most possible? "Kendra, do you want a large? Can we get a large with the coupon, ma'am?" The girl looks at the coupon and informs us that it doesn't specify a size, so yes, we could get whatever we wanted. So I voted for a large. Kendra was rather overwhelmed at my generosity - if you can picture Kendra being overwhelmed.

We got out to the car and she asked me why I had paid for a large blizzard? I said I was just trying to get the most possible off the coupon. Then I thought about it.

What can I say. Nope, nothing. Let's just say goodnight there. and hope someone's learned her lesson from that one.

Guatemala - Day 1, Part 3

Here is Installment 3. Yes, she knows. Sharon... is... slow. Go ahead and say it (or type it) to her face, she won't be too awfully immensely hurt.

================================================================

It was still the same day. The team had just landed in Guatemala. Three buses were waiting for them... one for luggage (mostly), two for people (mostly). Off for the mission house. Along the way they took in the Guatemala sights of hot-pastel colored buildings and infamous desperado chicken buses - which will pop into this story again at future unnerving intervals.

The mission house lay at the end of many one-way, steeply inclined, narrow streets in San Lucas. When they arrived, it felt like 7 p.m. and their bags were promptly dumped and they were ushered into a big room with the places already set and served what they supposed was supper... Afterward, during announcements, they were given their freedom for several hours till supper (Oh my goodness - do we have to eat again, so soon?) and strict orders about the type of relationship allowed with the tap water. Basically, it was a total mouth-off relationship, aguatically speaking: no drinking, no inhaling, no brushing your teeth with it, unless you wanted to go on medication the rest of the trip.

After this, many people went off to brush their teeth, including our heroine, who promptly had people screaming in her face "NO! NO! Don't use the water!!" as she rinsed out her mouth... time to trot off for some Cipro.

At this point, most of the team was ready to just settle down and relax after the long day of traveling. One person was, however, very antsy after being cooped up on planes all day - despite enjoying them immensely - and somehow she persuaded some other young folks to go on a walk. It started out as a group of 3 girls, who were informed they had to take along big, tough guys. So they collected people and walked down from the mission house into San Lucas. Their friend Sam excited their appetites by pointing out a dead smashed cat by the roadside as their future supper. Down in the middle of the town, they found a little round structure with a deck for the second floor. There were lots of kids playing around this and on the soccer court, and some of the team members instantly made dozens of friends by pulling out digital cameras and taking pictures with the kids left and right.

They got back about dark, to find people huddled in coats and blankets complaining about the 40-degree cold, and a sumptious supper awaiting them. Right after supper the 4 teams were listed off - 2 medical, 2 VBS, one of each on each bus, to go to separate locations each day. But for Saturday morning they would all be together in San Lucas.

And after all of this excitement, and that excitement, after translators and friends of the team showed up to visit, at some point they all fell into bed and slept hard.

The End of Day 1!

Commentary

This is not to be funny, or to poke fun, or to be cute, or to be blonde just for kicks. Honestly. This is what might go through someone's mind if they knew quite a bit about current and historical events, but not excessively much... and happened upon this article below, that has such an interesting sequence of reporting.

News article from the Guardian that was on Drudge Report yesterday. Non-copyrighted commentary is in italics between asterisks.

================================================================

To see this story with its related links on the guardian.co.uk site, go to http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/mar/13/north-korea-japan-nuclear-missile

Japan warns it may shoot down North Korean satellite launcher
Justin McCurry in Tokyo
Friday March 13 2009
guardian.co.uk

Japan today threatened to shoot down a satellite that North Korea plans to launch early next month if it shows any signs of striking its territory.

*Oh my goodness. North Korea's launching a missile and Japan's jumping to shoot it down?*

Tokyo's warning that it would deploy its multibillion-dollar missile defence system raised tensions in the region after North Korea said that it had identified a potential "danger area" near Japanese territory along the rocket's flight path.

*Grand, grand, grand... so North Koreas is saying, "We're launching this missile and it might hit you guys in Japan, just giving you a heads up."*

The regime told the International Maritime Organisation that the missile would be launched during daylight between 4 and 8 April, and that its boosters would fall into the Sea of Japan ? about 75 miles (120km) from Japan's north-west coast ? and the Pacific Ocean.

*Well, that was smart of them to plan a missile launch that could drop things near Japan.*

Officials in Tokyo said they reserved the right to destroy any threatening object in mid-flight, despite North Korean warnings that it would consider such a move an act of war.

*Here we go... Japan: "You launch something and we are shooting it down. This is definitely a threat." North Korea: "You shoot at our missile, that means WAR!"*

"Under our law, we can intercept any object if it is falling towards Japan, including any attacks on Japan, for our security," Takeo Kawamura, the chief cabinet secretary, told reporters.

*Oh... Japan is being pretty rational, not to mention expressing itself pretty clearly... Japan: "If you launch something that heads our way, we're intercepting. And yes, we're still intercepting even if you're just doing an all-out attack."*

Despite repeated assurances from Pyongyang that the rocket is a vital part of North Korea's space programme, other countries in the region suspect the hardware is a Taepodong-2 ballistic missile.

*Neighbors: "Space, my foot. It's a ballistic."*

South Korean intelligence has reported a build-up of activity in recent days near the missile's launch pad at Musudan-ri base on its neighbour's north-east coast.

*(imagines South Korean intelligence center with those hospital heart monitor screens on all of North Korea's bases. All show undulating relaxed patterns below the line "Normal" - , except the one for the Musudan-ri base where there are violent peaks above the line "Build-up" - )*

Any missile launch, even one intended to put a satellite into orbit, would represent a snub to the US administration, which has repeatedly invited the communist state to return to negotiations over its nuclear weapons programme.

*Oh wait, this is a SATELLITE and not a missile? Why does this remind me of two kids poking each other?*

Last month the US secretary of state, Hillary Clinton, urged the north to cancel the launch, which US officials say would be in violation of a 2006 UN security council resolution.

*I didn't know that... so the UN said "No launches, period", including satellites.*

The South Korean foreign ministry said in a statement: "If North Korea goes ahead with the launch, we believe there will be discussions and a response by the security council on the violation of the resolution."

*South Korea: "If North Korea launches something that could hit something, the U.N. Security Council will probably hold a meeting."*

The UN secretary-general, Ban Ki-moon, said a missile or satellite launch would "threaten the peace and stability in the region."

*I would say that the pre-launch talk and assumptions have already generously threatened the peace and stability in the region.*

After Japan's transport ministry ordered airlines and shipping companies operating in the area to take precautionary measures, Japan Airlines and All Nippon Airways said they would alter flight paths on several European and other routes.

* All Nippon Airways = All Japan Airways... US Airways... hee hee!*

Speculation has been mounting for weeks that North Korea was about to put its hitherto unreliable missile technology to the test. The regime suffered a setback in 2006 when a Taepodong-2 missile ? theoretically capable of reaching Alaska ? blew up moments into its flight.

*Wow, so the technical danger is at least as great as the political danger, and probably the same thing for a lot of people.*

Japan has intensified efforts to protect itself against conventional missile attacks since 1998, when the north test-launched a long-range rocket over its territory without warning.

*So there is a history. This chapter looks like an improvement. North Korea is actually warning you, Japan.*

In response, Japan and the US have jointly developed a ballistic missile defence system that includes interceptor missiles on board ships and Patriot missiles dotted around Tokyo.

*That's probably why North Korea is warning Japan. I had no idea the U.S. was in this too...*

But experts believe that a rocket capable of launching a satellite into orbit may be too high to intercept.

*Science: "Guys, seriously. This may well go out of sight, out of mind."


Copyright Guardian Newspapers Limited 2009

=================================================================

Closing commentary: From the commentator's viewpoint, in this imperfect world, interactions between nations look a lot like interactions between individuals, only to the nth power, where n = average number of influential individuals involved on each particular nation's "side".

Spring, spring, spring-ing ahead

No, this is not an exciting post that you will want to read.

Just wanted to assure everyone that Sharon is still alive over here. And plans to continue the Guatemala story shortly.

And the coughing has subsided almost entirely.

Twice now I have felt a very strong urge to remind everyone to set their clocks back an hour. How about you not listen to me for Daylight Savings time reminders.

It's raining outside. It's a beautiful drippy evening. And so I think this is the perfect time to share a favorite excerpt from a favorite book - Nightwatch, by Terry Pratchett.

===================================================

The main character is standing in the police department and hears a song, by a group of trolls passing by outside.

Somehow, you could tell it was made up by a troll:

"Now we sing dis stupid song!
Sing it as we run along!
Why we sing it we don't know!
We can't make der words rhyme prop'ly!"
"Sound off!"
"One! Two!"
"Sound off!"
"Many! Lots!"
"Sound off!"
"Er... what?"

=======================================================

So I hope it's understood that I'm posting this Saturday night, to be read on Monday, not Sunday. Just so no one gets on me for irreverency.

Ardith should get a prize, as it happened to be her copy of the book I was reading in bed, and dropped, because of uncontrollable laughter.

Seeking counsel from coughing experts

I'm glad to be coughing... you know, bronchitis or whatever is much better than an actual miserable cold.

But is there some correct way to cough that doesn't:

A) make you gag
B) give you a severe headache in the top back peak of your head

Better yet, can you pull the whole "mind-over-matter" trick and just not cough? I'm sure my head, abdomen, and colleagues would be eternally grateful to you (although the lungs might not be...)

Guatemala - Day 1, Part 2

Well, there they were... 12 of the 14 Warsaw team members, on the plane for Miami.

Sharon was so happy to be waiting for takeoff, after a 2-year break from flying. And she had the privilege of sitting next to Brittnee for her first flight! See the photo below. And you thought Sharon didn't take any pictures on the trip. Hah!

After some vigorous gum chewing, the plane settled down into peaceful quiet, with the Warsaw percentage dozing off... quiet, except for the loud snoring of a certain doctor, which was on purpose to keep poor Amanda "Demanda" awake.

(Sorry, no one is getting mercy in this story. Please note that names within quotes are the Spanish pet names picked up at some point during the trip.)

They were landing in Miami. What perfect squares the city was laid out in, and yes, decorated with really-truly palm trees! And off through security again, whipping off coat, sweater, shoes, scarf, yanking them back on... and on, following the direction that the sea-shells gilded onto the floor pointed, on to find the next gate. Till they were helpfully accosted and accompanied by Danny from Delaware. Oh, the hugs that ensued on meeting up with the Delawarians... at least, for the old-timers. And oh, the happy waiting for the next flight, the time whiled away with sushi, orange juice, and Danny's infamous jelly beans.

You would not believe how quick it is to get from Miami to Guatemala City. One minute you are filling out the customs papers handed out first thing by the stewardess, and the next you see the beautiful mountains of Guatemala circling up to meet you.

This is not yet the end of the Longest Day Ever, which began at 1 AM. But it is after 9 PM and high time for someone to go to bed and get more of that wonderful sleep that you can see she got on the plane.

To be continued...

Guatemala - Day 1, Part 1

1:15 AM - - the alarm clock goes off. Time to get uncurled from that chair, grab those bags, and get out in that car. Time to go to Guatemala!

It's an eerie 10-minute drive to meet the rest of the Warsaw Team at Dr. Gary's clinic. Sharon is plenty early... unfortunately but ironically, once the van and trailer arrive to load up, she discovers that she has not forgotten her passport... no, she left it back at the house on purpose because she was convinced someone else had it.

"If I don't get back in time, just go without me," she says and trots off to her car. Back to the house at a very efficient speed, trying to imagine how she'll ever live this down if the team has to leave her behind...

But don't bother feeling for her now, because it is about to get much, much worse. Passport securely in purse and almost back to the clinic, Sharon slows way down for the intersection with the blinking red light, doesn't quite stop before she turns right past that police car pulling up. <Bam> it whips around with its lights.

Okay friends, it is now high time to be sick at heart, especially while we wait for the officer to finish chatting with a passerby. But God in His goodness lets the officer skip over that old registration Sharon yanks out of the glove department. 10 minutes later, she is free.

What suspense to approach the clinic parking lot... yes! The van is sitting there, waiting!

2.5 hours later, the team safely arrives at O'Hare, despite everyone breathing and fogging up the windows. They get almost all their passports scanned in when an airport deadline suddenly slams down. Off runs most of the team, shoving baggage and medicine totes as they go - off to run through security and run to the gate and get soundly berated by the ticket lady for not being early. Somewhere behind them are Tim and Aaron, trying to catch another flight.

To be continued...

Anakin, we love you... despite yourself

I had a first thought for this post, but on second thought... how about saving that first thought for tomorrow.

Let's go to a third one, which is really a lot older and should get priority anyway.

[Commercial - reminded to post this by reading the fabulous story my brother Jason is telling us over on his blog. So far it appears to be a space drama that he's making up each night as he types, albeit with considerable unexpected twists, such as sudden group deaths.]

The other night I was watching cable TV. You know, since we have it. Actually, this time I had decided to skip my cable TV and go over to a friend's house so I could multitask - watch cable TV and walk on the treadmill.

I was flipping through the dizzying array of channel choices, when there it was. The Phantom Menace! I think. Let me see, what are the titles of the other two last-but-first-but-definitely-last ones... oh never mind. Anyway, I was mildly ecstatic for about 10 seconds, till the intro had rolled off into space and suddenly there was a distinctively animated creature. Yes, down in the bottom right-hand corner was some Toon Network logo.

Out of sheer curiosity, I stuck around for a couple minutes and ended up watching enough to get these fine lines. Don't they just bring back all the glory of Star Wars?

We've been betrayed.

I don't want to kill you...

Anakin, you must learn to control your insults.


By the way, you shouldn't pay too much attention to my blog post titles because frankly, some of them are just to get attention.

Pictures, maybe

Testing 1-2-3...

Ice Storm!

[Update] Make that "Pictures, definitely"

(December 2008)

We working women

My word, housework takes a long time. Is that why I do it only twice a week, or is that because I only do it twice a week? Or is it a vicious cycle that's going to accelerate exponentially till it collapses in on me? And on whom can we blame all this?

If you're bored on a Sunday

Being tired is so tiring.

Well, it is completely my fault for volunteering at 3 p.m. on Sunday to meet halfway to pick up Kendra. Any way you look at it, halfway is still 8 hours for each party. Add in lots of black ice on one side and super good roads on the other, and you have each party traveling at least 10 hours.

(Mommy, I hereby accept full responsibility. You can even kick me out of the will if you want.)

So from 4 p.m. to 2 a.m., it was quite a Sunday afternoon drive. And a great adventure! And definitely worth it to have Kendra safely here and ready to start classes tomorrow. And to see Daddy and Ethan for about 2 minutes. And almost worth it... yes, I think almost worth it to feel this ready for bed!!

Can I do this?

"Yes?"

"The bill was $2200 and I paid $4000. How can that not be paying it in full?"

"Well, when is the new company going to take over? Because you guys are doing an awful job. Is there someone I can call and complain to?"

"And your name?"

"Okay, you all could stand to work on your customer service as well, because your attitude really stinks. Bye."

*~*~*~*~*

I'm just wondering. Can I say this and be Christ-like? (In a nicer tone, of course.)

Where exactly does "turn the other cheek" come in? My first instinct is to say, "That's for when I am being persecuted for my faith." But the context in Matthew 5:38-42 seems to be anyone taking advantage of you or being mean to you.

Put it back in the business world. As my friend points out, if you never "complained" to the manager, the disagreeable person could go on being disagreeable and making things worse for the company. Now I think if there is any room to "complain", it should be for the employee's sake just as much the company, or the manager, or the general public, or myself, or anyone.

Looking forward to having everyone respond and answer this for me. So nice of you.

Wheee, here we go!

Quick, let's see how much more I can say before anyone realizes there are new posts on this blog...

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

My car suddenly showed up with low oil, so I checked it today before leaving work. The parking lot at work is a nice flat place. The lady pulling out just in front of me stops, rolls out her window and asks, "Are you all right?"

I was kind of expecting that, as should all little blond girls who stand before their popped hoods. So I responded politely, "Of course. I'm just checking my oil, like all the other smart people who check their oil after work. That way the car is level and the engine has cooled down for a while." Or, I guess I may have stopped after the "checking my oil" part.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Everyone is talking about all the snow we are going to get. Some say 6 inches. Some say 3. I almost want to chime in with my colleague from Minnesota, "Snow? What snow?" I hope we do get a good dump sometime soon. We were kind of spoiled last year, getting snowed in twice before Christmas.

"Which brings up the question," says someone else, as we are discussing all the snow that's coming, "why do humans live so far north?" Because some of us are tough and you aren't, I guess.

I don't necessarily live for the cold either, but goodness gracious sakes, let's at least enjoy it - brag about how hardy we Northerners are, or take it on as an exciting adventure. Hunkering down is all very well, but I find that just makes you feel colder.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Once upon a time there was a girl who got a car, got herself auto insurance, and set up automatic monthly payments. No thinking required.

This begins around April. Come December, she suddenly recalls that she agreed to a 6-month plan and it has probably expired by now, no matter how you count months. She gasps as she finds her insurance card with an expiry date in October, then hunts and hunts through her mail for an expiration notice that never shows up. Poor girl, she is starting to feel anxious, and - worse yet - stupid. (Save your tears because there is a whole lot more stupidity coming.) Now she is pretty sure she cannot legally drive, at the worst possible time of the year, when she loves offering rides to one and all over the snow and ice in her car with the fantastic snow tires. Oh, it hurts. And even stingier on this Saturday morning is the thought of leaving for home on Tuesday!

Now, she could have just check her bank account online to see if they had debited her payment again that month, but no, if she had thought of it, it probably would have proved nothing.

Well, she manages to bum rides off others till Monday morning, when she risks driving herself to work. The memories of lights and sirens during her two recent escapades with the police keep floating through her mind. (I don't care about the punctuation or clauses, just read the story.)

First thing on lunch break, she runs out to make a call on her cell phone. Yep, it's to the insurance agent. As he looks up her account, she tries to imagine how many days they could drag out a policy renewal, and what she will do about getting home..."

"Oh, you're fine. The policy just gets automatically renewed if you don't tell us otherwise."

Oh! She's fine! And she could just - do something really awful, maybe even to someone, for having gone through all that stress for nothing ... except that once she sees the joke on her, it's really too funny to not laugh all the way back in.

But that story is no excuse for "dumb blonde" jokes. It's not "dumbness", folks. It's a relatively rare, violent attack of stupidity.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

This post would not have been possible, were it not for siblings like Ardith and Jason, and quite possibly some parental genes as well.

After Christmas

2,800 miles later... back in Warsaw!

(And really, 5 days ago)

We are (read: I have talked Stacey into) leaving our Christmas decorations up as long into January as possible. The Christmas tree can stay up as long as at least 70% of it is not on the ground. I know it's already after the technical date of Epiphany, but if our holidays are symbolic anyway... if we celebrate Christ's birth on December 25th, it's really more effective to wait at least a month for the Magi to arrive. Besides, Stacey just got a beautiful nativity scene plus the Magi, as a Christmas present. I think it would be a complete lack of courtesy to immediately pack it away till next Christmas.

And time is flying by this year, as someone at work pointed out to me - only 50 weeks to go.

... And then it [Christmas] goes and leaves us here
What will we do the rest of the year?
We will live the whole year through
Only looking forward to
Christmas-tide and Christmas cheer
Yes Christmas comes but once a year.

(No, I didn't make that up, it's a song.)